The more I learn....

... the more I learn how much more there is to learn.

My latest semi-obsession is modern cloth nappies. (Diapers, for those in the USA) . Granted, Baby isn't here yet, and I have no experience with parenting whatsoever. However, I'm fairly committed to using cloth nappies. For those that aren't familiar, cloth nappies no longer refer to just the flat squares of cloth requiring folding and pinning, but rather are styled much like disposables, complete with velcro closers, waterproof backing and elastic leg holes. However, that's a drastically simplified version.

My original, somewhat prejudgiced opinion when beginning my research into modern cloth nappies (MCN) was that there were no NZ made MCN available. There was one brand I found that was sold through an organic baby product store, but they're imported from the States. (Which to my American mind, just figures.) Mind you, I was wrong about this - I've since found five independant, online-store websites selling unique made-in-NZ MCN, another website with products required for making one's own nappies (not an option for me as I have neither tools nor talent) and a couple NZ websites retailing various imported brands of MCN.

More than that, I've become immersed in nappy culture. Still without ever having changed a nappy (cloth or disposable) I can tell you the different kinds of modern cloth nappy, the ages said kinds are best suited to, various protection methods to take with the various types to prevent leakages, the advantages and disadvantages to using cloth nappies, both financially and environmentally. I've even joined a website forum that's filled with people talking about cloth nappies and not a lot else.

But the real kicker, that I don't like to admit too often, is what got me so hooked on MCN to begin with. Yes, MCN are cheaper than disposables in the long run (even when using a system that needs multiple sizes for the child as the child grows). Yes, they're more environmentally friendly. Yes, they're more labour and have more potential complications. However - hands down, MCN are just so darn cute! So while I still find myself suffering major information overload when trawling through pages dedicated to MCN, pros, cons, why's and why-not's, I know at least one thing for sure. My baby will be pooing in style!

What I wish for my marriage...

Intangible - the ‘what’

• To be respected
• To always have a safe forum in which to share any and all emotions, experiences, and thoughts
• The knowledge that I have the support of my husband in all aspects
• To be and to have an equal and contributing partner in the marriage
• The knowledge that myself and our children are the most important thing, people, priority, in my husband’s life
• To feel cherished
• To have a home that represents and expresses myself as much as my husband

Tangible - the ‘how’

• A kiss and a cuddle first thing, every day, when the last person home arrives
• A kiss goodbye when leaving the house for the day
• A kiss goodnight when going to bed
  
• Regular acknowledgement and appreciation for things that have been done - i.e., dishes, cleaning, ‘normal’ daily tasks that contribute to the good of the household
• Some time every day to catch up as a couple with no other distractions. This can be dinner together over the table (without TV, books, magazines, etc) or otherwise arranged.
• A weekly date - just the two of us, together, focusing on enjoying time together, even after Baby arrives. Preferably the same time most weeks.
• A husband who spends the majority of his sleeping hours at night in bed with me.
• To be included in my husband’s life - his joys, his sorrows, his worries and his frustrations. To be the first one consulted on major decisions as a matter of course.
• Occasional accompaniment on outings - be it to the movies, the mall, the grocery store, etc, simply for the job of being together
• To be free from critiscm over those things that didn't get done that day
• To be given help willingly when I need / ask for it